Purple: My immediate family and I are very close, probably closer than most families. We're very compacted because we're in a space where there isn't a lot of space, which makes us very close nit. The rest of my family live far away, the closet family members we have live in Seattle and even our family friends are far away. I'm the closest with my younger sister because my parents style of parenting is very old school and their knowledge on life is important, however their advice is a little out dated and not in the right culture. Their filipino rules and culture shock makes them less flexible so my sister is the one that I could relate to the most and she understands me, unlike them. She may be younger, but she has an old personality and is way smarter than I expected so because of that I am usually more comfortable with her, but also more strict because she's my baby sister, even if she's mature. My mother will forever hold a very special place in my heart. Until I was 5, she was the signature parent while we were in the Philippines because my dad worked abroad. My youngest memories are with her. But here in America, the roles were switched and I only get to see her once a week because she is a caregiver. But with that said, our relationship has never weakened, I'd argue that it's still strong. We may be close, but she's not as calm as I am. She's more aggressive and stressed, however she's also smart and down to earth and I've never seen angry without a purpose. I wish things could be different where I'd have her all the time, but that's difficult and I know she works for us. I know she can't because of her commitments, revolving around me. Because my mom isn't around as much, my dad is around a lot. I've always been pretty close to him. He's a very broken man, with a broken family and a broken past. Overall, I love my family and that's that.
Red: I'd like to consider myself very family- oriented. We're pretty close. We always do our own things, but Sundays are always family days. We're not as close as we were before, but we're still pretty close. I would never really go to my family for personal advice, but I go to my older sisters for girl advice. My family is super large! Education, to them, is important but they're too focused on the price. My 3 older siblings have all gone to community college because they didn't know what they wanted to do, but I'm different. My siblings and I have a very typical relationship. I'm close to each of them on different levels. My brother and I are close on a funny level, my sisters on a girly level, and my younger siblings on a weird level. All of them are my rocks. My family and I have gone through a lot. What brought us closer together was my little sister. She was born with congenital nevi, cancerous moles, on her head, neck, shoulders, and back. Congenital nevi has a super low survival rate and she needed years of recovery after surgery at 6 months old. We were always at the hospital and my entire family would come together, which made is very close. There was a point where all 6 kids and our parents lived together, but because my 3 older siblings are half siblings, problems were bound to happen. My older brother was kicked out of the house when I was in the 2nd grade. My oldest sister moved out her senior year and then so did my second oldest sister because they didn't get along with my mom(their step mom). By the time I was in the 5th grade, the three oldest were gone and I was left with my two younger siblings. It was rough for me because I had no one to look up to anymore but I knew for a fact that I didn't want to be like them. I saw how much they affected my parents and siblings and I would never do that to them. I am determined to finish high school and have the little ones look up to me.
Green: My family is extremely different. We were all raised very differently. We're connected but separate all at the same time. All of us do our own things, there's no such thing as "family days". Sometimes, it kind of feels like none of them actually want me there, but we're all obligated to be there. It's rare to have everyone together even if the immediate family is small. My legal guardian is my aunt, I go to her for money and school stuff, but I don't go to anyone else for anything. I'm pretty independent. Growing up, I always kept to myself. My brother and I moved in with my aunt when we were younger, but he was a little older which meant he understood things more. I don't remember much but I know he does. He too likes to keep to himself, sometimes I feel like he thinks he doesn't belong with us. When our dad died, we never once talked about it. We bonded for a second after it happened, but that was it. We've never had an open relationship. My family has a rough background so they really wanted us to get a good education and make something out of ourselves. Either way we'd be successful because we've made it farther than most and never affiliated ourselves with bad people. I've never felt the pressure of going to college, but I am the smartest of the family. I want to experience something new, be on my own and just be an individual. I don't consider myself to be family- oriented but I'd come back if I ever leave. I've always been like my brother, we both hate having to associate ourselves with family members.
Blue: My immediate family is very close. My other relatives don't live close at all, and they're scattered around the world, but we still keep in touch. My dad and I are super close, practically best friends. My relationship with him is unlike most because I'm very close with him and I don't keep secrets from him. He and I are very americanized so we both see things similarly. He's a very hard worker and I respect that. Our personalities are also very similar, especially our sense of humor. On the other hand, my mom and I have a very unique relationship. It's really hard for us to see eye to eye because our personalities clash. Growing up, I felt like she played favorites with my brother so that really affected our relationship. Also, we don't spend a lot of time together because we'll get on each others nerves quickly. She's a good multitasker, yet she's not good at giving me attention. My grandmother plays the mom role usually. She's the strongest woman I know, she's been through so much and has fought everything thrown at her. She was raised very differently than the way I was raised but she, surprisingly, always understands me. My brother and I have always had a rocky relationship. We have always gone at it, like cats and dogs. Our constant arguing split the family, him and my mom vs. me and my dad while keeping all the fights a secret from my grandma. Sometimes I feel like my place in the family is irrelevant, just because everyone is always very busy. Although we have gone through a lot of problems, we seem to always resolve them. It's been a rocky road but it was worth it. Each family member is completely different, but together we make sense.
When talking about their families I noticed that all of them got pretty uncomfortable so I told them that instead of facing me, they should lay down and just speak. Surprisingly, it worked! Purple was really comfortable with telling me anything and so was red but I felt green being a little distant because some things were harder to talk about than others and blue actually got a little emotional. I understand that talking about your past could be hard, but it's good to be open about your feelings rather than keeping them bottled in. I know that where a person has been doesn't define where they're going, so for our next session I want to know who they want to be and what they want to do with their futures.
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